lewisthegreat2 0 Report post Posted December 30, 2009 Remember the US F1 chassis? Well, as it turns out, Ken Anderson contacted Ralf Schumacher not to be race driver, but to actually be rear wing (come on, come on...I've made it obvious, ask the question, ask it ask it ask it, ask if it's a certain kind of spec rear ring, come on...) If only he had accepted. Bad jokes aside, Franck Montagny turned down both Renault and US F1 to focus on Le Mans. I can't say I really care. Oh, and, Nelsoninho's probably back. At Campos. Exciting. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JHS 1 Report post Posted December 30, 2009 Oh, and, Nelsoninho's probably back. At Campos. Exciting. Except he's not: A Spanish motor racing website has admitted its exclusive story aboutNelson Piquet signing for the new Campos team was a hoax. Motor21.com said earlier this week that the 24-year-old 'crashgate'conspirator had penned a three year deal, with his triple world championfather and namesake buying a 15 per cent stake in the Spanish outfit. The news was published on December 28, the Spanish holiday known as 'Dayof the Innocents', which is similar to April Fools' Day. Motor21.com confirmed that the Piquet story was indeed a "celebration" ofthe holiday. http://www.motorsport.com/news/article.asp?ID=354201&FS=F1 Thank God for that! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lewisthegreat2 0 Report post Posted January 4, 2010 Today in F1, Pedro de la Rosa is probably in at Sauber and he definitely has funding from somewhere. Probably la Caixa. Which is probably why he didn't go to Campos, who probably have BBVA, maybe. And why he didn't go to Ferrari, who desperately wanted him over Alonso, because of Santander. Same with McLaren. One wonders if Santander can sponsor Ferrari as Santander and McLaren as Abbey if they'll back Team US F1 as Sovereign Bank. Just kidding. Team US F1 are going to start their own bank after they cure cancer, bring capitalism to those mean bad guys in Europe, and end the mean awful discrimination of US drivers based on their lack of talent. And whatever else Peter Windsor claims their wheel-less, wing-less, engine-less, c#ckpit-less, driver-less, sponsor-less chassis of God can be utilized for. So they won't need a bank to sponsor them. That leaves poor old Nick Heidfeld at Renault. Or worse: Campos, if Renault decide it's time to sign Ralf Schumacher. Or Mick Schumacher, who is probably the better choice, honestly, depsite being somewhere around 10 years old. Or Cora Schumacher, who really represents Ralf's F1 career perfectly: ugly. But anyway, to each their own, though if that's the best his wages and six grand prix victories can buy, one wonders why we value money and success so much... I'm not particularly thrilled by this news, but I'm not particularly upset, either. PDLR just doesn't do anything for me. Seriously. Alonso's baked me cookies, Massa's brought me my teddy bear when I'm having bad dreams at night, Hamilton's been the first black person I've ever seen (hooray for my all-white town of all-whites)...they've all done something. Pedro, well, not so much. I tend to think he's not really all that good at being all that good when it comes to piloting an F1 car. He's a lower lower mid-pack driver in an upper middle mid-pack team with an upper upper front-of-the-grid teammate who is probably a distant relative of God, Juan Pablo Montoya, and God's only son Kak Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Quiet One 15 Report post Posted January 4, 2010 Today in F1, Pedro de la Rosa is probably in at Sauber and he definitely has funding from somewhere. Probably la Caixa. Which is probably why he didn't go to Campos, who probably have BBVA, maybe. And why he didn't go to Ferrari, who desperately wanted him over Alonso, because of Santander. Same with McLaren. One wonders if Santander can sponsor Ferrari as Santander and McLaren as Abbey if they'll back Team US F1 as Sovereign Bank. Just kidding. Team US F1 are going to start their own bank after they cure cancer, bring capitalism to those mean bad guys in Europe, and end the mean awful discrimination of US drivers based on their lack of talent. And whatever else Peter Windsor claims their wheel-less, wing-less, engine-less, c#ckpit-less, driver-less, sponsor-less chassis of God can be utilized for. So they won't need a bank to sponsor them. That leaves poor old Nick Heidfeld at Renault. Or worse: Campos, if Renault decide it's time to sign Ralf Schumacher. Or Mick Schumacher, who is probably the better choice, honestly, depsite being somewhere around 10 years old. Or Cora Schumacher, who really represents Ralf's F1 career perfectly: ugly. But anyway, to each their own, though if that's the best his wages and six grand prix victories can buy, one wonders why we value money and success so much... I'm not particularly thrilled by this news, but I'm not particularly upset, either. PDLR just doesn't do anything for me. Seriously. Alonso's baked me cookies, Massa's brought me my teddy bear when I'm having bad dreams at night, Hamilton's been the first black person I've ever seen (hooray for my all-white town of all-whites)...they've all done something. Pedro, well, not so much. I tend to think he's not really all that good at being all that good when it comes to piloting an F1 car. He's a lower lower mid-pack driver in an upper middle mid-pack team with an upper upper front-of-the-grid teammate who is probably a distant relative of God, Juan Pablo Montoya, and God's only son Kak Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HandyNZL 1 Report post Posted January 4, 2010 Whilst the "driving tester" point is valid, PDLR is still not a great choice in my book. Why would a team such as Sauber need this? They are not a "new" team, like say Campos, whom such a driver could be beneficial. Quick Nick is a better proposition as he knows the team, the team knows him. Has Peter Sauber ever used pay drivers? I can't thinks so from memory, unless someone else knows perhaps??? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dribbler 6 Report post Posted January 4, 2010 Pedro De La Rosa? Seriously? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Insider 0 Report post Posted January 4, 2010 Heidfeld will want to be in the most competitive car he can get his hands on. On order of suitability that may mean: 1. The second seat at Renault, 2. The lead drive at STR, 3. The lead drive at Sauber. Kubica's management haven't clarified Robert's position after the equity sell off yet, so he will be waiting on that, no doubt. Have Sauber ever had a 'pay' driver. Well, they were privateers and Peter doesn't have bottomless pockets. The probable answer is 'yes' but they never sought to advertise the fact. Kobayashi will certainly be bringing something to the party but it probably won't be enough to pay someone like Nick's wages. Pedro is a waste of petrol if you ask me. He doesn't have penetrating pace and he hasn't been in an F1 car for a while. Clearly, Davidson couldn't find the cash to buy a drive and I would think that is endemic at this particular era of the sport. Having not been confirmed at STR, Alguesera is certainly going to have to buy his way into Campos if he wants to stay in F1 and if PDLR doesn't go there. Nick's fourth choice is possibly the third driver spot at MGP. He won't need sponsorship, he'll get a small retainer and there is always Schumi's dodgy Gregory Peck. Mercedes will definitely want an experienced driver in that position. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JHS 1 Report post Posted January 4, 2010 As for NH to Renault alongside Kubica...will be like a poor man's BMW New slogan for Renault! I remember the BMW one from this year "BMW doesn't just make cars, it makes joy" (Pff, not for both drivers this year it didn't! ) so Renault's slogan can be "Renault is proud to support Robert Kubica and Nick Heidfeld.....it's like a poor bloke's BMW!" For every advert they show in the commerical breaks, there can be a different (and even horrible sounding) pronunciationof Kubica! Genious! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Persevere 0 Report post Posted January 4, 2010 Today in F1, Pedro de la Rosa is probably in at Sauber and he definitely has funding from somewhere. Probably la Caixa. Which is probably why he didn't go to Campos, who probably have BBVA, maybe. And why he didn't go to Ferrari, who desperately wanted him over Alonso, because of Santander. Same with McLaren. One wonders if Santander can sponsor Ferrari as Santander and McLaren as Abbey if they'll back Team US F1 as Sovereign Bank.... The de la Rosa seat confirmed: http://www.planet-f1.com/story/0,18954,3213_5830254,00.html Not necessarily a bad choice but one no doubt linked to much needed funds for Sauber. Stating the obvious - a virtue of mine - it's not easy being a small team in F1. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kopite Girl 0 Report post Posted January 4, 2010 For some reason, PDLR reminds me of a cheap version of Christian Bale. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Persevere 0 Report post Posted January 4, 2010 Is it timely news that Robert K. is absolutely and most definitely not going to race for anyone other than Renault F1? I swear I can't keep track of all the indecisiveness in F1. http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport2/hi/motorsport/formula_one/8439373.stm Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dribbler 6 Report post Posted January 4, 2010 For some reason, PDLR reminds me of a cheap version of Christian Bale. He's like a tall and lanky version of Susan Boyle, but with less driving ability and smaller balls. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HandyNZL 1 Report post Posted January 4, 2010 The de la Rosa seat confirmed: http://www.planet-f1.com/story/0,18954,3213_5830254,00.html Not necessarily a bad choice but one no doubt linked to much needed funds for Sauber. Stating the obvious - a virtue of mine - it's not easy being a small team in F1. That's not confirmation...that's still a speculation piece. The only clues are "experienced" and "new information".....which leaves the possible candidates as: Alain Prost Nigel Mansell Antonio Pizzonia Ralf Schumacher Luca Badoer Stirling Moss Mario Andretti Michael Andretti Mika Hakkinen ....get my point yet? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lewisthegreat2 0 Report post Posted January 4, 2010 Here's a laugh: Team US F1 have signed Jos Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JHS 1 Report post Posted January 4, 2010 Is it timely news that Robert K. is absolutely and most definitely not going to race for anyone other than Renault F1? I swear I can't keep track of all the indecisiveness in F1. http://news.bbc.co.u...one/8439373.stm Ooh! Will he, won't he? *Eastenders drums*. Will Robert....Kub...ica? (That right, I have no idea about the Polish guy) ever accept Renault's appology for cheating on him with David Richards like that whilst he was rallying? Will quick beardy Heidfeld EVER actually land anywhere? And who is that random guy with a bad attitude and a hawk like nose? Ohh, it's him....Anyway, find out next time in F1 enders! Yeah, I should really stop making Soap Opera related jokes. Otherwise somebody might actually think I watch that rubbish. Tsh! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JHS 1 Report post Posted January 4, 2010 When it comes to US F1 though, maybe this is what they are making their driver choices on? On three. A one, a two, a one two three! Alex Wurz is for when we curse, Pedro De La Rossa thinks we're tossers, The Stig comes when we're run out of money from our pig, God to tell us when we're a knob, Schumacher for the name on the paper, They won't know its wonder Ralf, Tony because his name ryhmes with "Sony", The caretaker because he's cheaper than the bloke from the bakers The p**s-takers can laugh, but they don't know that we'vehired a giraffe. Bottom of the list is Jame Rossiter. He should be able toshift us a toaster! What about Jaime Alguerusari? Exept I can't think of anything to rhyme with his sucky-namey. Chad might be mad, but we won't worry, Youtube will get us out the poo chute in a hurry! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kopite Girl 0 Report post Posted January 5, 2010 When it comes to US F1 though, maybe this is what they are making their driver choices on? On three. A one, a two, a one two three! Alex Wurz is for when we curse, Pedro De La Rossa thinks we're tossers, The Stig comes when we're run out of money from our pig, God to tell us when we're a knob, Schumacher for the name on the paper, They won't know its wonder Ralf, Tony because his name ryhmes with "Sony", The caretaker because he's cheaper than the bloke from the bakers The p**s-takers can laugh, but they don't know that we'vehired a giraffe. Bottom of the list is Jame Rossiter. He should be able toshift us a toaster! What about Jaime Alguerusari? Exept I can't think of anything to rhyme with his sucky-namey. Chad might be mad, but we won't worry, Youtube will get us out the poo chute in a hurry! WOW. AMAZED! Dizzee Rascal's agent's gonna snap you up, boy. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dribbler 6 Report post Posted January 5, 2010 Jaime Alguersuari = Naan Peshwari. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Persevere 0 Report post Posted January 5, 2010 That's not confirmation...that's still a speculation piece. The only clues are "experienced" and "new information".....which leaves the possible candidates as: Alain Prost Nigel Mansell Antonio Pizzonia Ralf Schumacher Luca Badoer Stirling Moss Mario Andretti Michael Andretti Mika Hakkinen ....get my point yet? Don't be silly; Nigel can't fit in a formula one tub. Besides, he already has a gig: http://auto-racing.speedtv.com/article/lms-mansell-and-sons-to-race-ginetta-zytek/ Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Insider 0 Report post Posted January 5, 2010 USF1's web site looks like a low-budget, agricultural machinery portal. I have nothing against the team at all but with Chad Hurley on board, one might have expected a much more high-tech, public gateway for America's first Grand Prix challenge since the evolution of the information superhighway. Instead, we find something akin to a $25 blog template and though I am sure everyone at USF1 believes they will be on the grid in 2010, if appearances count for anything, it's still only a fantasy. Are they for real? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Persevere 0 Report post Posted January 5, 2010 USF1's web site looks like a low-budget, agricultural machinery portal. I have nothing against the team at all but with Chad Hurley on board, one might have expected a much more high-tech, public gateway for America's first Grand Prix challenge since the evolution of the information superhighway. Instead, we find something akin to a $25 blog template and though I am sure everyone at USF1 believes they will be on the grid in 2010, if appearances count for anything, it's still only a fantasy. Are they for real? As soon as they get a couple of wings and 4 wheels they'll have a car ready for the track. Let's face it guys, Italy has long since ceased to be the center of all things that matter in racing, and England is fading fast. The future of racing is in Charlotte, North Carolina. So sayeth Peter "Dream a little dream" Windsor. (He was much more tolerable as track-side reporter.) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HandyNZL 1 Report post Posted January 5, 2010 I hope they do make the grid. I'm for as many teams as possible...the great, the mediocre, and the laughable. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Quiet One 15 Report post Posted January 5, 2010 Hey! Don't talk like that of the team with the only Argentinian racer. By the way, Jos Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lewisthegreat2 0 Report post Posted January 5, 2010 USF1's web site looks like a low-budget, agricultural machinery portal. I have nothing against the team at all but with Chad Hurley on board, one might have expected a much more high-tech, public gateway for America's first Grand Prix challenge since the evolution of the information superhighway. Instead, we find something akin to a $25 blog template and though I am sure everyone at USF1 believes they will be on the grid in 2010, if appearances count for anything, it's still only a fantasy. Are they for real? I'm sure everyone at US F1 believes they will be on the grid in 2010, too, but they only have 35 employees. I think we can find 36 people who say they won't be there. Besides, all 35 are on month-to-month contracts. Hooray for job security. They'll never finish the car. When they do, it'll fail the crash tests like version one did. If it ever made the grid, they'd be as many seconds off the pace as they have employees. Their driver lineup is going to blow, their car is going to blow, and most things coming out of Peter Windsor's PRs are going to blow, too. Waaaaaah I hope they do make the grid. I'm for as many teams as possible...the great, the mediocre, and the laughable. I don't. They're jingositic xenophobic meanies who are mean and they suck. Actually, I think I only hate them because I really hate their crappy fans who say things like "I MUST SUPPORT THE HOME TEAM AT ALL COSTS" and "AMERICA IS THE BEST IN THE WORLD THEY WILL KICK EVERYONE'S a## LET'S SHOW THOSE EUROw#nkerS WHAT CAPITALISM IS ALL ABOUT" etc etc. Perhaps I'm only so harsh on US F1 because their fans are getting to be disgustingly annoying. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HandyNZL 1 Report post Posted January 5, 2010 Huh? They have fans already? Come on Eric....it's just you, isn't it? Aye? Aye? Aye? (No I'm not Canadian, aye) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
