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JHS

2011 Rumour Mill

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Dr. Cheyenne Clark? That's got to be a pseudonym. Who are you and what have you done with the sweet and lovely Kopite Girl?

Oh lordy. You think Kopite Girl is sweet and lovely? Have you no morals, man? :roll:

I HATE my first name. Its awful. My parents were hippies. Well I cant use that cause mum loves motown and Dad loved country and rock. So when they named me at least they had the good sense to give me a normal middle name. Which is Steph. Which is me! OMGBBQPANTSKTHX I'M CLEVER!

I talk too much. :lol:

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Some one said here that Massa is a good team mate for Alonso, K*K man, he whines when he has to make way. All he has to do to get Alonso of his back is to run away from him during the race, or sit on his arse for a number of laps.

And for the 13th team, I would love to see JV back on track. But with no cash, they will also be struggling to keep the car racing, let alone staying in F!. Ask Prost!

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I'm not speculating. I'm telling you how it is. And that may sound arrogant, you know me, thats not what I'm trying to be.

How can it be speculation when it was happening in front of us. Don't get me wrong, thats Schumacher's decision to agree to it. Everyone thought Kimi would bang massa to oblivion. Quite the contrary with the hired hand of Michael.

What happened in front of us? Felipe driving around Fiorano with 'L' plates whilst Michael sat on his lap and jabbered in his ear? MIchael was in a sort of ambassador/technical/'still interested and he did quite well for us so we had better give him a job' type role. Not at any time did anyone mutter that he was a driver coach but that Kimi didn't want it.

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What happened in front of us? Felipe driving around Fiorano with 'L' plates whilst Michael sat on his lap and jabbered in his ear? MIchael was in a sort of ambassador/technical/'still interested and he did quite well for us so we had better give him a job' type role. Not at any time did anyone mutter that he was a driver coach but that Kimi didn't want it.

Yeah Ok. I can't be bothered to argue the facts. You win.

Hey, does anybody know if James Rossiter is still around?

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[quote name='Pucky the Whale' timestamp='1281044017' post='322424']
Yep. No new suppliers until 2013. Joining now would be stupid.

So I guess we can expect Chevrolet in 2011. ;)

Seriously, my predictions for the 2011 grid...

McLaren
1. Lewis Carl Davidson Hamilton, M.B.E.
2. Jenson Alexander Lyons Button, M.B.E.

Red Bull
3. Mark Alan Waaaaaahbber
4. Sebastian Useless Vettel (I don't forget my old nickname for him, and I feel vaguely right...the guy can't put a complete race together. I knew all along Liuzzi and Speed were better choices)! ;)

Ferrari
5. El Rey Fernando Alonso Díaz
6. Felipe Rubensbarrichello Massa, Jr.

Mercedes
7. Nico Keke Rosberg, W.A.G.
8. Michael H. Schumacher, M.D.

Renault
9. Robert Piotr Kubica
10. Ho-Pin Trustfund Tung

Force India
11. Adrian Sutil, B.A.M.F. and Nico's 2012 replacement
12. Paul di Resta Franchitti, Michael's 2012 replacement

Williams
14. The Rightful 7-Time World Driving Champion Rubens Barrichello, M.R.B.F.C.
15. Nicolas Umlaut Hülkenberg

Toro Rosso
16. Sébastien Olivier Buemi, (thankfully) not Bourdais
17. Jaime Víctor Alguersuari Escudero

Lotus
18. Heikki Johannes Kovalainen
19. Prince Jarno Trulli, N.M.B.E.

Virgin, [b]who are ranked below HRT in the WCC[/b] and if it weren't for their pretty logos would be the laughingstock of F1
20. Timo Conway Glock
21. Vitaly Aleksandrovich Petrovsky, Communist

Outside looking in:
1. Sauber F1 after Parris Mullins and Chad Hurley failed to buy them
2. Hispania Racing Team after not getting the Toyota TF110, VWAG buyout, and/or Ferrari engines
3. The Kamui Kobayashi after being the worst-funded pay driver yet most talented
4. Vitantonio Taxcheat Liuzzi after learning contracts don't mean sh*t when your teammate beats you despite having the extreme disadvantage of not being heterosexual
5. Pedro Martínez de la Rosa after knowing he was out since he first started
6. Bruno Senna Lalli Earnhardt, Jr. after being miserable
7. Karun Slower-than-Hildebrand-on-the-Force-India-simulator Chandhok after being miserable (sorry, finishing P13 by retiring after 90% of the race is completed and qualifying ∞ seconds off the week doesn't make you worthy of anything that isn't the IRL)
8. D.J. Sakon Yamamoto who, as someone once said, for a D.J., he's a damned good...D.J.
9. The nicest person in auto racing Simona de Silvestro, who, while talented, just isn't quite at F1 level in funding and the results aren't there despite the pace. And she's too nice and has no ego so she'd never succeed.
10. Sergio Pérez Mendoza, because Carlos Slim still isn't buying an F1 team for the tenth year in a row.
[/quote]
Highly amusing. However, you will need to kill Peter Sauber to keep him out of F1 and Kamui is part of the future of the sport and will still be around, whatever might happen elsewhere.

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Hey, does anybody know if James Rossiter is still around?

He's still single, if that's what you care about. ;)

No, Jimmy had a contract with US F1 with the backing of Mariscó Liqueur, but US F1 collapsed. He then tested with KV Racing in IndyCar with the Lotus black and gold colors and Mariscó once again on the sidepod, but for whatever reason did not get the ride and Takuma Sato became the Lotus/KV IndyCar driver. Since then, I haven't heard anything about him. I'm not sure he's F1 material, but I loved watching him in LMP2 and if he still has funding, I wouldn't be surprised to see him land somewhere in something.

Highly amusing. However, you will need to kill Peter Sauber to keep him out of F1 and Kamui is part of the future of the sport and will still be around, whatever might happen elsewhere.

While I want to agree, I'm just not sure yet. I hope Sauber can stay around; perhaps they turned down buyers because they didn't need one, not because the buyers had to turn themselves down. I, too, am a big of Kobayashi's driving, but there are no top-tier seats open, and the ones that are mean he'll have to do a ride-buy, which, at the moment, he isn't doing. He won't disappear, but he might have to pull a Massa and sit out a year of racing while being the reserve for a better team until they can find room for him/farm him out. I'd love it if he could land somewhere in a race seat, though; preferably Sauber or Renault.

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Adrian Sutil is now being linked to Renault.

It makes so much sense I feel like I suggested it once a while ago. Sutil brings funding, which Renault need, but his talent far outweighs that of Tung or another pay driver. It allows Sutil to step up to a better team and enables Force India to honor Liuzzi's contract while still bringing di Resta into a race seat to please Mercedes.

Therefore, it won't happen. :P

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Adrian Sutil is now being linked to Renault.

It makes so much sense I feel like I suggested it once a while ago. Sutil brings funding, which Renault need, but his talent far outweighs that of Tung or another pay driver. It allows Sutil to step up to a better team and enables Force India to honor Liuzzi's contract while still bringing di Resta into a race seat to please Mercedes.

Therefore, it won't happen. :P

You have now doomed Sutil's chances of ever getting a Renault seat. Are you happy?

Yes, I still remember the "Brawn GP will score no points" prophecy. And yes, I'll try to make a promise that's the last time I'll bring that up. :P

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He's still single, if that's what you care about. ;)

No, Jimmy had a contract with US F1 with the backing of Mariscó Liqueur, but US F1 collapsed. He then tested with KV Racing in IndyCar with the Lotus black and gold colors and Mariscó once again on the sidepod, but for whatever reason did not get the ride and Takuma Sato became the Lotus/KV IndyCar driver. Since then, I haven't heard anything about him. I'm not sure he's F1 material, but I loved watching him in LMP2 and if he still has funding, I wouldn't be surprised to see him land somewhere in something.

While I want to agree, I'm just not sure yet. I hope Sauber can stay around; perhaps they turned down buyers because they didn't need one, not because the buyers had to turn themselves down. I, too, am a big of Kobayashi's driving, but there are no top-tier seats open, and the ones that are mean he'll have to do a ride-buy, which, at the moment, he isn't doing. He won't disappear, but he might have to pull a Massa and sit out a year of racing while being the reserve for a better team until they can find room for him/farm him out. I'd love it if he could land somewhere in a race seat, though; preferably Sauber or Renault.

Too young for me, Eric!

Thank you though. I think he's a brilliant little driver. F1 should grab him now!

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Glock says he's committed to (a) Virgin.

I guess that ends any speculation that he was off to Renault, then. One less candidate for Petrov's seat.

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Yeah, it was this one's too. Seems everyone has been linked to the second Renault seat at some point though...

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Bah, I am yet to see one candidate that offers as much as Petrov. The guy actually pays for his seat, he is young, not too shabby at all and learning fast. Why exchange him for some old also ran which willdemand a salary or the next Bourdais/Piquet Jr.?

My humble pice of advise to Renault: keep Bob, keep Petrov, keep upgrading and you will have one of the best pairing, a potential WDC contender and all the borscht you ever wanted.

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Bah, I am yet to see one candidate that offers as much as Petrov. The guy actually pays for his seat, he is young, not too shabby at all and learning fast.

Plus, his Mrs is a bit MILFy.

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I see that word Milf all the time, what does it mean?

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I see that word Milf all the time, what does it mean?

You taking the p**s? Or you being serious?

If you're being serious, it stands for "mother i'd like to ****".

If you're taking the p**s, then, ha ha, bully for you, you suckered me in :P

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Plus, his Mrs is a bit MILFy.

If you are on about the person I think you are on about, I don't think that is his "Mrs". It's his agent.

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If you are on about the person I think you are on about, I don't think that is his "Mrs". It's his agent.

She's an agent alrighty, a Russian agent, and they all have a certain attraction - I know these things, I watch films.

He plays hide the suasage with her, according to my friends at emm eye fiveandabit.

:P

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Hide the sausage :lol: ..aka spearing the bearded clam.

:eusa_think: Wonder if a clam ever shaves?

You can tell it's the summer break TP, we'll be back into 'Alternative Names for Shagging' in no time :lol:

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I feel like an a##hole bringing this thread back on topic, but...

Keith Wiggins, owner of the HVM IndyCar team, has stated that a few F1 teams have been in talks with his driver, Simona de Silvestro. She has a brilliant attitude and a lot of talent (all cars are not equal in the IRL; hers is the 2003 model and is therefore much, much heavier than the cars Penske or Ganassi have), though the results haven't been reflecting how well she's run (top five runs squandered by other drivers taking her out, or flat tires, or all sorts of other things...some her fault, as a rookie, some others, some no one's). She's easily the nicest driver I've ever met.

BUT.

For all the praise, for all the talent, she's P18 in IndyCar right now. Yes, her car sucks, yes her luck sucks, but...results count. You could be P1 in IndyCar, four years in a row, winning every single road race in the worst car and not be F1 material. Sure, she's beaten Sato, who has a better car, and Baguette, who has a similar but slightly better car, and Danica, who has a better car, and Adam Caroll who has a better car, and all sorts of "big name" drivers, but beating Patrick is like saying someone's beaten Senna, well, no sh*t they have, and Sato...eh.

Her team have said her feedback, natural talent, and understanding of the car, as well as her attitude, far outpace Robert Doornbos', who they did work with for a long time. But again, Doornbos wasn't the pinnacle of who you measure yourself against.

So, while I want Simona to be in F1, and want her to suceed...I think IndyCar will be an easier world for her, with the attitude she has; I think she needs to run at least GP2 before F1, perhaps even F3/GP3/WSR or some such; I think the F1 teams and the FOM are going to try to hype up the fact she's a woman, which is something she really never wanted, so I'm not sure she'll enjoy her time there if she goes, and that may sour her great attitude and hurt her career; and I think that, while she has been one of the most impressive drivers in IndyCar this year, some people may be overrating her on the basis of her being a woman, and that's not fair to her.

I am interested, though, what teams are talking, and what kind of programs they might implement (i.e. GP2 ride and the very limited testing that can be done). I'd assume it's some of the smaller teams, but Simona brings no funding, and she doesn't use herself as a "marketing tool," so I'm not sure who it could be. Sauber? There's the Swiss connection, but again, do they need funding?

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I feel like an a##hole bringing this thread back on topic, but..............

...........I am interested, though, what teams are talking, and what kind of programs they might implement (i.e. GP2 ride and the very limited testing that can be done). I'd assume it's some of the smaller teams, but Simona brings no funding, and she doesn't use herself as a "marketing tool," so I'm not sure who it could be. Sauber? There's the Swiss connection, but again, do they need funding?

Sorry Eric, it's naughty people like me that have taken it OT, apologies.

I agree, Simona does look like she could mix it in F1, and she's been mighty impressive so far. Sadly, I think she would have to use the 'marketing tool' of being a woman, the areas of sponsorship and marketing it could open up are possibly her biggest chance of raising interest high enough for her to get a decent chance (as opposed to an HRT-type chance).

It would be good to know who's been talking with her, and regarding Sauber, yes, even though Peter Sauber says he's confident of a healthy budget next year, they would want more funding.

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Sorry Eric, it's naughty people like me that have taken it OT, apologies.

:lol: No worries. I love when topics go OT; that's usually the only way I can get in on them. I just picked a bad time to enter some news about a female driver in light of hiding sausages and such. :P

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:lol: No worries. I love when topics go OT; that's usually the only way I can get in on them. I just picked a bad time to enter some news about a female driver in light of hiding sausages and such. :P

Or, looking at it the other way, a good time :P

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I don't really see that there's a place for her at Sauber. Right now it looks pretty strong that Perez will be there next year, and they seem keen to retain Kobayashi.

For all her talent, I just don't see where she'd fit in on the grid right now. But, with all the things the Bernster has been saying lately how Danica would be great for F1, it seems someone in the sport, somewhere, is keen to get a female driver in.

I find it a bit silly that the likes of Danica could be able to say she's interested and easily get a drive somewhere. It shouldn't matter about the gender of a driver. If a driver's good, they are good. Right now, even in Indycar, Danica isn't so good. It'd just be silly in my opinion, to give her a seat over some really talented guys out there below F1 looking for a break in the big time.

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