Clicky

Jump to content

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

lechilka26

Best Joke Ever ;)

Recommended Posts

Yeah. Its hilarious, especially if you're on the receiving end of it - so stop talking utter bollocks, yeah?

Labrado - I hope I never offended you. Please continue with your joke. :thbup:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yeah. Its hilarious, especially if you're on the receiving end of it - so stop talking utter bollocks, yeah?

Labrado - I hope I never offended you. Please continue with your joke. :thbup:

Well, maybe I was skating on thin ice there. Perhaps if it was told to just the 'boys' it could have been less offensive. Personally, I found the joke very funny. I mean imagining it gave me a tummy ache from laughing. I must also add that when jesting around with pals, we throw around the word with gay(ouch) abandon. Well,at least I do. Of course, I'm not flippant about rape in its serious context, so to speak. It's a crime to be punished with death, nothing less.

No, you did not offend me. You disagreed politely. Fair dinkum.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
It's a crime to be punished with death, nothing less.

I find it a fascinating subject because it challenges our acceptance of civilization versus our animal instincts. The emotional termoil inflicted upon anyone raped is obviously considerable but i believe that stems from social issues and the taboo that has been created over many thousands of years, not the act itself, which let's be blunt, done properly should be pleasurable, as nature intended it to be to incentivise us to recreate.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I find it a fascinating subject because it challenges our acceptance of civilization versus our animal instincts. The emotional termoil inflicted upon anyone raped is obviously considerable but i believe that stems from social issues and the taboo that has been created over many thousands of years, not the act itself, which let's be blunt, done properly should be pleasurable, as nature intended it to be to incentivise us to recreate.

I could be wrong, but I think even the females of other species "take objection" to being forced upon. Perhaps it's a natural instinct to resist unwanted sex?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Yeah. Its hilarious, especially if you're on the receiving end of it - so stop talking utter bollocks, yeah?

Murder isn't funny either if you've been affected by it either. In fact there are a ton of things that people joke about regularly which probably aren't too funny when you're on the receiving end of it, but nobody bats an eyelid when you joke about them.

Rape is not a special case. As with any joke it's all context.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Murder isn't funny either if you've been affected by it either. In fact there are a ton of things that people joke about regularly which probably aren't too funny when you're on the receiving end of it, but nobody bats an eyelid when you joke about them.

Rape is not a special case. As with any joke it's all context.

Fair enough. But I never said that murder was funny, did I? You however stated that rape was. There's a bit of a difference. Context or no context - I took offence to your comment. Thats my own problem, but thanks for your response. ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Trying to not offend any one is difficult,

Sorry Redheads................

WHERE DO REDHEAD BABIES COME FROM?

After their baby was born, the panicked father went to see the

Obstetrician. 'Doctor,' the man said, 'I don't mind telling you, but I'm a

little upset because my daughter has red hair.

She can't possibly be mine.' 'Nonsense,' the doctor said.

'Even though you and your wife both have black hair, one of your ancestors

may have contributed red hair to the gene pool.'

'It isn't possible,' the man insisted. 'This can't be, our families on both

sides had jet-black hair for generations.'

Seeing that the getleman would not accept this explaination the Doctor tried a different approach:

'Well,' said the doctor, 'let me ask you this. How often do you have sex?'

The man seemed a bit ashamed.

'I've been working very hard for the past year. We only made

love once or twice every few months.'

'Well, there you have it!' The doctor said confidently. 'It's rust.'

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I don't get it. Please throw some light. Yeah, I asked a bit late...

Perch is a type of fish.

Or, it's really subliminal and they are perched on a smelly penis.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

POLITE WAY TO PEE

During one of her daily classes a teacher trying to teach good manners,

asked her students the following question:

"Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady,

how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?"

Michael said, "Just a minute I have to go pee."

The teacher responded by saying, "That would be rude and impolite. What

about you Peter, how would you say it?"

Peter said, "I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I'll

be right back."

"That's better, but it's still not very nice to say the word bathroom

at the dinner table.

And you, little Johnny, can you use your brain for once and show Us

your good manners?"

Johnny replies "I would say: 'Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to

shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope you'll get to

meet after dinner."

The teacher fainted.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Way back in 1998, when torrents & Fat Fcuk Frank didn't exist, I had no option but to worship the seedy theatre that showed sleazy skin-flicks. On one such occasion, while watching an English smutty film, the sound levels suddenly dropped when some dialogues were being mouthed(!). So one guy screamed in Marathi (a local language),"Hey crank up the volume!!" To which another guy shouted out in the same language "a##hole, do you understand English?" That brought the house down. :lol:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Husband emerged from the bathroom naked and was climbing into bed when his wife complained, as usual, "I have a headache."

"Perfect" her husband said. "I was just in the bathroom powdering my p*nis with grand-pa.

You can take it orally or as a suppository,...it's up to you !"

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Way back in 1998, when torrents & Fat Fcuk Frank didn't exist, I had no option but to worship the seedy theatre that showed sleazy skin-flicks. On one such occasion, while watching an English smutty film, the sound levels suddenly dropped when some dialogues were being mouthed(!). So one guy screamed in Marathi (a local language),"Hey crank up the volume!!" To which another guy shouted out in the same language "a##hole, do you understand English?" That brought the house down. :lol:

:rofl:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

He got his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-75, pushing the pedal even more. Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw the highway patrol behind him, blue lights

flashing and siren blaring.

He floored it to 100mph, then 110, then 120. Suddenly he thought, "What am I doing? I'm too old for this," and pulled over to await the Trooper's arrival.

Pulling in behind him, the Trooper walked up to the Corvette, looked at his watch and said, "Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes.

Today is Friday.

If you can give me a reason for speeding that I've never heard before, I'll let you go."

The old gentleman paused. Then said, "Years ago, my wife ran off with a Florida State Trooper. I thought you were bringing her back."

"Have a good day, Sir," replied the Trooper

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
POLITE WAY TO PEE

During one of her daily classes a teacher trying to teach good manners,

asked her students the following question:

"Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady,

how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?"

Michael said, "Just a minute I have to go pee."

The teacher responded by saying, "That would be rude and impolite. What

about you Peter, how would you say it?"

Peter said, "I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I'll

be right back."

"That's better, but it's still not very nice to say the word bathroom

at the dinner table.

And you, little Johnny, can you use your brain for once and show Us

your good manners?"

Johnny replies "I would say: 'Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to

shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope you'll get to

meet after dinner."

The teacher fainted.

:lol:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Excuse me for offtop, it too funny, haha! :)

Why it is good to be a man?

/buycelebrex/cheapest_buy_celebrex_cheapest_buy_celebrex_side_effects_cheapest_buy_celebrex_c

anadian_pharmacy_che.12414093.0.01105.html"].[/url]

so fuunnyy :) )

This is why if I were a F1 driver, I would like to race for Red Bull

http://www.f1complete.com/content/view/9290/900/

:lol:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
A husband and wife were in the process of getting a divorce and were fighting for custody of the kid.

The judge had heard arguments from all sides and just before he gives his decision he asks the father why he should give him custody.

The husband says, " Well your honour, if you put a dime in the vending machine and a cold drink comes out, Does it belong to you or the vending machine????"

Case closed

:D Very Funny....

durex_fathersday.jpeg

Very good Marketing campaign by Durex... Loved it...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

President Clinton is out jogging, and he encounters a man with some puppies. Clinton asks the man what kind of puppies they are, and the man responds, "They're Democrat puppies, Mr. President."

Clinton thinks that is so great that the next day he brings the first lady to see these puppies for herself. He asks the man to tell Hillary what kind of puppies they are, and the man responds, "They're Republican puppies." The president looks puzzled and says, "Yesterday, you told me they were Democrat puppies." The man smiles and says, "Yesterday, they were. But today, they have their eyes open!"

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

×
×
  • Create New...