elgo 1 Report post Posted February 10, 2010 MY RANT: I hate you all. BAZINGA!!! Well, had to spend close to 4 hours standing in an art gallery for the launch of the new agency that I'm working for. Legs killing me. Absolutely no babes, save for one former Miss India, at the event. The a/c was too cold & tortured my skin. In turn, my skin tortured my bladder. In turn my bladder nagged me unbearably, asking me to relieve it of its discomfort. Well, so I trudged my way to the only loo. As the previous occupant exited the loo, I made my way in to the stench of the worst smelling turd ever. Turned out his excretions hadn't made their way to a watery grave, but were very much alive in the potty. Abusing him behind the safety of the closed door, I used the flush. Of no avail, for there was no water. Delaying the tinkle wasn't an option given the pressure. So, I was forced to pee on another man's turd (oh, back when my home had an eastern-style toilet, I'd pee on my mound. It was fun to see the well-set thing break down the way a hardened convict breaks down in an interrogation room, after being subjected to hours of Britney's music). Anyway, coming back to the topic, it was the most disgusting thing I've ever had to do. It felt like my urine's arc was a bridge for his turd to make way to my one-eyed snake. To add further insult to insult, there was hardly any food. The tiny appetisers certainly don't count as food. Tried tasting wine. Puke. It tasted like medicine. So that's it. A horrible day. End of rant. Thank you for pretending to listen. YOU TRIED WINE!!!?? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Persevere 0 Report post Posted February 10, 2010 MY RANT: I hate you all. BAZINGA!!! YOU TRIED WINE!!!?? Yes, and after all of that LR was still interested in food. I love it! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LabradoRacer 2 Report post Posted February 11, 2010 MY RANT: I hate you all. BAZINGA!!! YOU TRIED WINE!!!?? It's ok and natural that you hate the rest of TF1, but why hate me? About the wine, well, I was hoping to get drunk & reckless enough to paw the ex Miss India. Too bad I couldn't go beyond a single sip. It was red wine, I think...some Merlin or Marilyn or Merlot (t silent?). Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
elgo 1 Report post Posted February 11, 2010 It's ok and natural that you hate the rest of TF1, but why hate me? About the wine, well, I was hoping to get drunk & reckless enough to paw the ex Miss India. Too bad I couldn't go beyond a single sip. It was red wine, I think...some Merlin or Marilyn or Merlot (t silent?). You know I'm not specially fond of dogs You should start combining it with coke. Now that's delicatessen! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kopite Girl 0 Report post Posted February 11, 2010 K. My beef is Rio f*cking Ferdinand. How the hell did that happen? I cannot abide that Manc scumbag. His top lip I want to tear off with a wax strip. Yeah. John Terry's been a bad boy. But Rio has a 4 match ban for violent conduct. England captain. Joke. Gerrard was overlooked as he had altercation a few months back. Cashley Cole's a cheat. I think Theo Walcott would do a fantastic job. Yeah he's young, but still - a whippersnapper like him would motivate. Capello, you're a mug. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LabradoRacer 2 Report post Posted February 11, 2010 On football, I'm furious & sad that that stupid, coke-snorting fatso football coach of Argentina has refused to include Juan Roman Riquelme. I really want Argentina to win the WC, but at the same time I want that fat b#####d to go to hell. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LabradoRacer 2 Report post Posted February 11, 2010 Yes, and after all of that LR was still interested in food. I love it! Whoa, it never struck me like that! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jean Todt 4 Report post Posted February 11, 2010 You know I'm not specially fond of dogs You should start combining it with coke. Now that's delicatessen! You must be fond of cats then... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Medilloni 6 Report post Posted February 11, 2010 Rant no.2 How I hate football. Overpaid, underperforming buch of pansies, "oooh ref, Koo...eee! I'm still on the floor waiting for you to give that naughty guy a red card 'cos he tripped me up on purpose.... then I'll hop back to me feet" bla fecking bla. And some question whether F1 is a sport? Give me break, football lost it's cred a fecking long time ago, and their training is pathetic - for what they're paid, these guys should be able to run for a week, in fact.... ........when I think what rugby players get paid, the graft they put into their training, the punishment they take in the game without lying on the floor holding their wickle bruises, sheesh. I don't remember a footballer being close to Olympic 100 mtr sprint times - why not? The guys with the oval ball make footballers look worse than a bunch of mard 8 yr olds, dressed as Grabsore the Himalayan girlies. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
elgo 1 Report post Posted February 11, 2010 You must be fond of cats then... Nope!I don't like animals.Quite weird, I know, but I don't see anything cute in them.They are dumb, smell bad and you have to take care of them. *Insert joke implying random forum member* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Quiet One 15 Report post Posted February 11, 2010 Nope!I don't like animals.Quite weird, I know, but I don't see anything cute in them.They are dumb, smell bad and you have to take care of them. *Insert joke implying random forum member* Sounds like Quiet One! No...wait... ...damn randomness! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Autumnpuma 0 Report post Posted February 18, 2010 Here's my rant: Well, had to spend close to 4 hours standing in an art gallery for the launch of the new agency that I'm working for. Legs killing me. Absolutely no babes, save for one former Miss India, at the event. The a/c was too cold & tortured my skin. In turn, my skin tortured my bladder. In turn my bladder nagged me unbearably, asking me to relieve it of its discomfort. Well, so I trudged my way to the only loo. As the previous occupant exited the loo, I made my way in to the stench of the worst smelling turd ever. Turned out his excretions hadn't made their way to a watery grave, but were very much alive in the potty. Abusing him behind the safety of the closed door, I used the flush. Of no avail, for there was no water. Delaying the tinkle wasn't an option given the pressure. So, I was forced to pee on another man's turd (oh, back when my home had an eastern-style toilet, I'd pee on my mound. It was fun to see the well-set thing break down the way a hardened convict breaks down in an interrogation room, after being subjected to hours of Britney's music). Anyway, coming back to the topic, it was the most disgusting thing I've ever had to do. It felt like my urine's arc was a bridge for his turd to make way to my one-eyed snake. To add further insult to insult, there was hardly any food. The tiny appetisers certainly don't count as food. Tried tasting wine. Puke. It tasted like medicine. So that's it. A horrible day. End of rant. Thank you for pretending to listen. WHY IN HELL DID I ENJOY THIS POST SO MUCH? I'M SORRY FOR LAB'S BAD DAY, BUT HIS DESCRIPTION WAS DAMNED FUN TO READ! WHY!!!!1??????!!!!!111? I HATE MYSELF. ahem. You should start combining it with coke. Now that's delicatessen! NO. NO, NO, NO! EX-MISS INDIA IS BEST ENJOYED WITH A FINE MADIERA. ahem. K. My beef is Rio f*cking Ferdinand. How the hell did that happen? I cannot abide that Manc scumbag. His top lip I want to tear off with a wax strip. Yeah. John Terry's been a bad boy. But Rio has a 4 match ban for violent conduct. England captain. Joke. Gerrard was overlooked as he had altercation a few months back. Cashley Cole's a cheat. I think Theo Walcott would do a fantastic job. Yeah he's young, but still - a whippersnapper like him would motivate. Capello, you're a mug. I DON'T UNDERSTAND A WORD OF THIS! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!? HAVE I LOST MY MIND?? ahem. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kopite Girl 0 Report post Posted February 18, 2010 My rant is about Mike. WHY DOESN'T HE KNOW WHAT I WAS ON ABOUT GRR DAMMIT LOL Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Persevere 0 Report post Posted February 18, 2010 (From Kopite Girl) "My beef is Rio f*cking Ferdinand. How the hell did that happen? I cannot abide that Manc scumbag. His top lip I want to tear off with a wax strip. Yeah. John Terry's been a bad boy. But Rio has a 4 match ban for violent conduct. England captain. Joke. Gerrard was overlooked as he had altercation a few months back. Cashley Cole's a cheat. I think Theo Walcott would do a fantastic job. Yeah he's young, but still - a whippersnapper like him would motivate. Capello, you're a mug." ************************************ I DON'T UNDERSTAND A WORD OF THIS! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!? HAVE I LOST MY MIND?? ahem. Crazy Brits. Hard to believe that once upon a time the sun never set on the British Empire... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kopite Girl 0 Report post Posted February 19, 2010 Crazy Brits. Hard to believe that once upon a time the sun never set on the British Empire... You like us really! -pulls innocent and cute puppy dog eyes- ah who am I kidding lol. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dribbler 6 Report post Posted February 19, 2010 Crazy Brits. Hard to believe that once upon a time the sun never set on the British Empire... Yeah, but just think, you never would have won the war if we hadn't stepped in. A+ at history, me. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Persevere 0 Report post Posted February 19, 2010 Oddly, I really do like you all. Mad Dogs and Englishmen, indeed. Wait a moment, this is the RANT thread, and I'm all out of complaints... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Quiet One 15 Report post Posted February 19, 2010 Wait a moment, this is the RANT thread, and I'm all out of complaints... ...and there's your rant! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ecapdeville 0 Report post Posted February 19, 2010 My rant is: I left this forum almost 2 years ago and when I came back I find it exactly the same as when I left! what happened here????? the only difference is a new BAZINGA word. Miss you all...glad to find you again. (with different names but the same nice people) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Autumnpuma 0 Report post Posted February 19, 2010 Has it been 2 years? Really? What the hell have I been doing with my life! .......I'm outta here!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kopite Girl 0 Report post Posted February 23, 2010 Jedward. And Vanilla Ice? WHY WHY WHY WHY? I'm a fool. Its a good job that I've got people who care for me. The M5 i put deposit on? Outstanding finance. But for the advice of someone, I'd have been well and truly f*cked. Literally saved my life. Still ranting at myself for being a stupid impulsive not-ahead-of-the-game idiotic moron. So totally out of character. Lesson well learned. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BradSpeedMan 6 Report post Posted February 23, 2010 My rant is: I left this forum almost 2 years ago and when I came back I find it exactly the same as when I left! what happened here????? the only difference is a new BAZINGA word. Miss you all...glad to find you again. (with different names but the same nice people) So why did you leave? No wonder there was this havoc, Wes almost had to close the website down... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dribbler 6 Report post Posted February 23, 2010 Jedward. And Vanilla Ice? WHY WHY WHY WHY? I'm a fool. Its a good job that I've got people who care for me. The M5 i put deposit on? Outstanding finance. But for the advice of someone, I'd have been well and truly f*cked. Literally saved my life. Still ranting at myself for being a stupid impulsive not-ahead-of-the-game idiotic moron. So totally out of character. Lesson well learned. It could have been worse. You could have bought the Jedward single. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Grabthaw the Hammerslayer 4 Report post Posted February 23, 2010 Jedward. And Vanilla Ice? WHY WHY WHY WHY? I'm a fool. Its a good job that I've got people who care for me. The M5 i put deposit on? Outstanding finance. But for the advice of someone, I'd have been well and truly f*cked. Literally saved my life. Still ranting at myself for being a stupid impulsive not-ahead-of-the-game idiotic moron. So totally out of character. Lesson well learned. Not a fool. You sought and took their advice. You'd have been a fool if you hadn't! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
